سه شنبه 30 شهريور 1400.
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IELTS Essay, Topic: Is financial education at school a must

 

Financial education should be a mandatory component of the school program. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

 

In many countries the discussion about financial education are getting more serious due to financial problems of young generation. Some people believed that financial education should be treated as a mandatory subject at school. read comment

The common problem for those young people is that they don’t know how to spend money in right way. As we can see many advertisements often carry out the message, “Only 10 dollars a week, no deposits �” it is misleading those young one think that living in debt is normal. A financial education is one of the solutions in order to solve this problem we mention above. The basic idea of financial education as a core school subject is to teach those young ones to understand the concept of using money, estimate a risk of finance money to buy something in the future. 

 

However, there’s another factor we need to consider about. In my opinion, the role of financial education is getting more important and it should be a part of the school program but the parents are also important and have responsibility to teach their child to learn how to manage the money. More than 70% of young people’s money are come from their parents. In addition, it has to be considered that a student might become money-mind person, talking about money all the time in class or even in a public place. It can be harmful for some students and affect their normal social life.

 

In conclusion, I believed that the financial education will have a positive effect for all young ones and other subject such social commutations should be considered as important as financial education.

 

This essay needs work. It covers the task and presents enough arguments for and against, the structure on essay level is fine. However there are many poorly structured sentences, many inappropriate expressions and many grammatical errors (see comments underlined in blue for more details). Overall looks like a band 6 � 6.5 essay.

 

Click here to see more IELTS essays of band 6

 

 

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