سه شنبه 30 شهريور 1400.
امروز :

IELTS Essay, topic: Traffic accidents

The best way to reduce the number of traffic accidents is to raise age limit for the younger drivers and to lower age limit for the aged ones. Do you agree?

 

Traffic accidents are on the raise these days. Most of the accidents caused injuries or either worse death. Research have found that most of the accidents are cause by inexperienced drivers, for example young drivers.

 

Young drivers tend to be more daring and are unable to avoid a crush when face with an on coming one. They tend to be more daring after some drinks of alcohol at night and cause them to lose control of the car. Drink driving will not only cause your own life but may also cause an innivent life to be lost.

 

The government should encourage the driving school to conduct driving lessons to yung drivers for a longer period. This will give them a clear picture about how accidents happen and the safety of others on the road. Drivers that have meet with an accident after drink driving should be ban from driving for at least two years and be given driving lessons again.

 

However, for the aged drivers, the government should not only lowered the age but also check the capability of the aged drivers for instance eyesight, hearing and other related health conditions to save driving. It does not mean that an aged person are not fit to drive and have a problem with the heart but a young or middle aged man could also have a change of heart failure these days.___

 

To conclude, I feel that to raise the agelimit of young drivers arenot the best solution but to give them more driving lessons about the problem they will encounter on the road and to ban them from driving if they have cause an accident due to carelessness. As for the age drivers, as long as they are capable on the road before a certain age and no health issues there shouldn’t be a problem.

 

This essay is too long; you have written 305 words instead of the advised 250-265. In the first paragraph you should have presented the topic of argument an the two opinions. The main issue here is multiple spelling and grammatical errors, see comments underlined in blue for more details. The task is covered, the paragraphs are coherent and logically connected by linking words. Overall, looks like a Band 6.5 essay.

 

Click here to see more IELTS essays of band 6

 

 

www.ielts-blog.com

 

تمامی حقوق مادی و معنوی این اثر متعلق به وب سایت  آموزش خصوصی زبان انگلیسی بابک عبادی است و در صورت استفاده از آن نام آموزش خصوصی بابک عبادی و ذکر لینک www.english-ebadi.com را فراموش نکنید.

 

نظر خود را اضافه کنید.

0
/component/komento/?controller=captcha&task=display&tmpl=component&captcha-id=607078
شرایط و قوانین.

برای کسب اطلاعات بیشتر در خصوص دوره ها و ثبت نام با ما تماس بگیرید

کارشناسان آموزش به سوالات شما پاسخ خواهند داد.

ارتباط با ما